Royal Rumble 2006 Review

Posted in In My Head by Jack at 06:22, Jan 30 2006

It?s Royal Rumble time, and since the rumble has always been one of my favorite WWE PPVs, I?ve been looking forward to it for some time. The rumble match itself can contain so may subplots and side stories that you can never predict everything that will happen. Will Masters and Carlito work together and dominate as they did in the last PPV, will there be a price on Shawn Michael?s head, will we have surprise wrestlers show up? You can never guess that will happen in this show, so without further ado, lets get ready to rumble.

Match 1: Cruiserweight Championship Open Invitational ? Gregory Helms, Kid Kash, Jamie Noble, Nunzio, Funaki, and Paul London

This was a good choice to start off the show. They threw together a lot of quick, talented guys to get the crowd worked up, and set the tone for the PPV. Although I expected a lot of flashy moves, everyone kept it pretty basic, although London did get in a couple crazy spots. Though there wasn?t much new to see here the pace was quick, and everyone executed well. The finish unfolded very quickly, and saw Gregory Helms get the win, and the belt. This show is off to a good start.

Next up is a Royal Rumble number selection segment complete with Vince drooling over the Divas, and HHH making genital jokes. Both HHH and Randy Orton pick their numbers.

We are then taken to a segment featuring Trish and Mickie James, who declares her love to a shocked Trish just before the next match.

Match 2: Mickie James vs. Ashley with Trish Stratus as referee

It seems the only purpose for this match was to foreshadow the unrequited love storyline that will apparently take place between Trish and Mickie James. I say that because that?s all the announce team talked about during the entire match. The announce team weren?t the only ones who?s minds wandered away from wrestling. The crowd started a ?we want puppies? almost before the bell sounded. This match was significantly slower that the opening contest, particularly when Ashley was on the offensive. Although her technique and form were very good, she was slow executing several of her moves. Mickie performed better, but I think was hindered by having to work with such a newcomer. The match ended with Trish somewhat reluctantly counting Ashley out 1,2,3. This was strictly Monday night action and not the stuff of PPVs.

Once again it?s time for Royal Rumble number selection, and once again we see Vince getting his jollies with the Divas and the Big Show and Rey Mysterio drawing their numbers. Rey once again dedicates this match to Eddie, setting up either a big win, or a tragic loss.

Match 3: JBL vs. The Boogieman

What do you do when you have a very popular wrestler, with a suspect move set, and questionable skill? You keep the match really short, that?s what. More time was spent with the Boogieman?s entrance and worm eating/sharing with Jillian that the actual match. Once the bell sounded a noticeably softer JBL worked over the Boogieman with some brawling in and out of the ring, but by the time you got settled into your seat, the Boogieman hit his pump handle slam and the match was over. Unless you liked the Boogieman dropping worms into Jillian?s mouth, and cleavage, there wasn?t much to see here.

More Royal Rumble number picks, as this time Melina ,Joey Mercury, Johnny Nitro, and Shelton Benjamin make their picks, and promise to eliminate Shawn Michaels as a favor to Satan McMahon.

A video package about the Rumble is played prior the start of the match. Then as the rules of the match are being explained the Spirit Squad comes out to kick of the match with a cheer. Unfortunately it wasn?t much of a cheer as many of them were short of breath after their entrance. I haven?t seen anyone blow up just by going to the ring since Howard Finkel back in the early 90?s.

Match 4: The Royal Rumble

I won?t go into detail on this match as it would take several pages to follow all the action, however I will point out some of the highlights. HHH and Rey Mysterio drew numbers 1 and 2 respectively and each hung around till the end of the match. Tatanka made an appearance before a very pro Tatanka crowd. He may be older and heavier now, but he can lay in the chops with the best of them. We also so the return of Eugene and RVD. Eugene looked as good as ever, however RVD looked a little bit rusty. Shane McMahon got back in the ring long enough to eliminate Shawn Michaels. HHH getting eliminated got almost, if not a bigger pop, than Rey Mysterio winning the rumble. Although they did not let one guy come in and ?clean up? as they have done in the past, I did enjoy this match, and it probably should have been the main event.

We then go backstage for more Trish/Mickie James interaction, a WrestleMania ad, Edge breaking up Rey?s victory celebration, and a video package explaining how Edge won his title.

Match 5: Edge vs. John Cena

Cena got a new entrance for this match, coming out on and extended scaffolding that streched all the way to the ring. Sadly this was the only thing unique or interesting about this contest. The match itself wasn?t bad, but it wasn?t anything special either. I caught my mind wandering a few times during this one. Cena did his usual thing, as did Edge, and in the end Cena got the win with the STFU. What I don?t get is how Cena, who had been booed so badly of late, could be cheered so loudly tonight. Poor Edge, he grabs the brass ring, only to be the Ricky Steamboat to Cena?s Rick Flair.

Hacksaw Jim Dugan makes an appearance backstage in order to make a ?HO!? reference in front of Lita. Afterwards we get a rundown of the recent history between Angle and Mark Henry, and are then taken to the main event.

Match 6: Curt Angle vs. Mark Henry

I was worried that the ?Worlds Strongest Man? would lead to the ?Worlds Slowest Match? but fortunately this was not the case. Although you can?t describe the match as a barnburner, it was wasn?t bad either. They played up the ?Henry?s to strong to tap to the ankle lock? angle having him kick out of it twice during the match. Angle didn?t shine in this outing, but he didn?t get much help from Henry in that respect. Although Angle was able to get the pin, he had to use two chair shots, and an exposed turnbuckle to do it. The good guy cheating to win, when the bad guy didn?t have to cheat, left me very unsatisfied with the outcome of this one. After the win, the Undertaker made his return, and made known his intentions to take Angle?s title. However, rather than take a piece out of Angle then and there, he instead saw fit to use his ?dark powers? to collapse the ring, something that should have been done during the Henry/Angle match to give it a little more spark.

Looking back on the show, I have to say that he cruiserweight, and rumble matches were the standouts of the night. The rest of the matches just weren?t up to snuff for a PPV. The other matches certainly were not bad, just average, and we can see average for free on Monday and Friday nights.