Durant has scored 25 or m

Posted in IYH Forums by jokergreen0220 at 10:22, Oct 06 2016

As a die-hard Baltimore Ravens fan, certainly Id like to ease into a 5-year, 40-million dollar deal with my boys in purple (though blue better complements my skin tone). Matt Beleskey Bruins Jersey . The club has a need at starting left tackle — with Eugene Monroe potentially on the move — and the entire offensive line is in disarray. Still, I tell myself, Ive got to stay open to possibilities. So Ive hired an agent. He keeps insisting hes not the type of agent Im seeking, and really wants me to check out a fully furnished 2-bedroom condo he wont stop talking about. His name is Gary Maguire and theres just something exciting about him. Maybe its the crazy look in his eyes. Maybe its that he keeps repeating "help me, help you". Whatever it is, he really gets me: Maguire: You dont look like an NFL player.Gallay: I get that a lot.Maguire: Not sure youre even muscular enough to be an NFL fan.Gallay: Im going to put my clothes back on.Maguire: Shouldnt you declare for the draft first—not free agency?Gallay: Theres too much running at the Scouting Combine. Not my strong suit.Maguire: So how am I going to pitch you to NFL front offices? What are your skills?Gallay: Im tenacious. Im focused. I cant catch a football, but I can clumsily swat at other people playing football. My wife says Im in the way a lot, so I plan on using that to my advantage. Im also dangerously delusional. (I hand him a doctors note.)Maguire: Fine. Ive seen more done with less. Lets talk staging. After discussing mortgage pre-approval for some reason, he and I come up with a plan. He explains to me how most NFL offensive linemen are well over six feet tall, roughly 300-350 pounds, a decade younger than me, and likely had a successful college career followed by some prior success in the NFL. I explain to him that Im not like other people. We settle on agreeing Im a maverick and get to work. "First, you need to put on 165 pounds." I tell him no problem, I did it once, I can do it again. He advises me Ill have to do it in under 35 years this time. Ideally hed like me to hit the target weight by mid-afternoon. Im on it, I holler, through large bites of tofurkey. He stops me as I head towards the bathroom, reminding me I cant afford to lose any weight today. "Next, you need to grow five inches, possibly seven." I explain to him that my whole allure is quarterbacks will have no problem seeing over top of me. Of the other significant O-line free agents, Branden Albert is 65. So is Eugene Monroe. And Rodger Saffold. Jared Veldheer is 68! My shortness and poor posture is EXACTLY how Im gonna differentiate myself from those terrifying brutes! Maguire is unconvinced, so I grudgingly step into the medieval stretching machine he found on Kijiji. It smells of pine wood and suffering, which Im told is exactly what Vince Lombardis station wagon smelled like. "Your hands are too small. Left tackles have huge mitts." Thats the least of my worries, I explain, as I wrap 50 yards of tape to my left hand. Well just tell coaches I have a sprained thumb and I should be better in 2-4 years. Everyone in the NFL is nursing an injury. Shows Im tough. "What about your embarrassing lack of football knowledge and acumen? You just called a touchdown a Pass-The-Liney-Scorey." Ill give it to Maguire, hes asking all the right questions. I explain how I consume 8 hours of NFL Network every day, a claim which seems to impress him. Also, Im able to name four other offensive linemen, none of them John Madden, which is more than 98% of football fans. (To be fair, since nobody knows their names, Maguire cant verify if Richie Incognito is an actual human being.) "Last thing. What do we do about your, um, advanced age?" No problem, I tell him. Im going to change my name to Stanislav Gomez, a young Cuban defector. (I figure if Oscar Isaac, a multi-talented Cuban-Guatemalan, can play a spot-on pasty neurotic Jew in Inside Llewyn Davis, surely I can do the opposite.) We both nod in unison, followed by an enthusiastic slow clap. Time to show me the money, Maguire. He advises me to not say anything else until Ive contacted a copyright attorney. And here we are, Tuesday, March 11, the opening salvo for NFL free agency. I see that Alterraun Verner my fellow hot commodity free agent has been tweeting bible verses to me (and all his followers) for the past several hours. My Verner Mountain Dog, what a joker! Gosh, I hope we land on the same team. Anyway, I better tweet him back before he gets worried. Also, I better get some rest (Im super fat now). Whatever happens, Im not worried. Its like my dad has always told me, worst comes to worst you fall back on your education. Thank goodness I got that Division I degree in sports anthropology. (Maguire knows a guy who knows a guy who is gonna get me a diploma.) Gonna be a big year. Gallays Poll #2 Which situation would be the best fit for Gallay? a) A multi-year deal with his favourite organization, the Baltimore Ravens (said every Steeler fan).b) Drawing five-pointed stars hoping the Devil shows up offering a deal.c) Pulling out of free agency until 2015 to realize all his goals in intramural soccer baseball.d) Discussing his dosage level with a trained professional. Ray Bourque Jersey . Five-time cup winner Sevilla became the nights only topflight team to be upset by a lower-division team when third-tier Racing Santander won 2-0 in Seville to overturn a 1-0 first-leg loss. Johnny Bucyk Jersey . The Canadians, along with Slovenia, had accused the French team of changing the shape of the athletes ski pants for better aerodynamics. Rules prohibit uniform alterations for such purposes. Calgarys Brady Leman finished fourth in the final to Jean-Frederic Chapuis, Arnaud Bovolenta and Jonathan Midol of France in Thursdays competition. http://www.jerseyhockeybruinsstore.com/authentic-jimmy-hayes-bruins-jersey-sale/ . - San Diego Padres centre fielder Cameron Maybin is going to be out two to three months after rupturing his left biceps tendon during a game against the Los Angeles Dodgers on Sunday.OKLAHOMA CITY -- This is what the Thunder had in mind when they picked up Caron Butler after the trade deadline. The forward scored 23 points to help Oklahoma City defeat the Denver Nuggets 117-96 on Monday night. He made 10 of 19 shots in 29 minutes as a reserve and posted his highest points total since joining the team. Kevin Durant, who had 27 points and eight assists, liked what the Thunder got from the 34-year-old Butler. "Thats what we want him to do," Durant said. "He was aggressive, and thats what we need him to do for the rest of the year." Butler said it felt good to get loose. "Im just getting into a rhythm," he said. "My teammates are doing a great job of finding me in flow, and Im starting to get a little more familiar with my game and understanding where I like the ball at." Reggie Jackson had 16 points and a career-high 11 assists, and Serge Ibaka added 15 points and seven rebounds for the Thunder, who won their fourth straight. The Thunder sat point guard Russell Westbrook so he could rest his surgically repaired right knee. Westbrooks knee took a hit from Toronto guard Kyle Lowry on Friday, but tests showed no further damage was done. The Thunder have been resting Westbrook for one game of back-to-backs, and Oklahoma City plays at Dallas on Tuesday. As usual, other players filled in successfully. "You have a system thats functioning," Butler said. "The only thing guys got to do is plug into that system and play a certain style and way and give a certain type of effort, and things just continue to move forward." Jackson, who had struggled at times since Westbrook returned after the All-Star break, played one of his best games of the season. "Hes just playing free now," Durant said. "You can just tell hes not getting in his own way, you know, thinking too much mentally and hes just going out there and playing." Ty Lawson scored 25 points, Quincy Miller and Timofey Mozgov each scored 12 points, Kenneth Faried had 11 points and 11 rebounds and Randy Foye had 11 points and four assists forr the Nuggets. Zdeno Chara Jersey. Denver allowed the Thunder to shoot 51 per cent. "We didnt get into the ball defensively," Denver forward Darrell Arthur said. "Our communication was off." The Thunder matched their highest points total in a quarter this season, making six 3-pointers in the first to take a 41-24 lead. Oklahoma City kept the pressure on and led 72-58 at halftime. The Thunder shot 60 per cent from the field and had their highest points total in any half this season. Durant had 22 points and six assists in the first half while Ibaka scored 15. Only one Thunder player shot worse than 50 per cent in the first half. "They came out strong, and we gave them a lot of easy shots," Lawson said. "It felt like they werent working for anything. Everything was pretty much easy in the first half, I think." Oklahoma City made just six of 18 shots in the third quarter, but the Nuggets were an even worse 3-for-16, so the Thunder actually extended their lead to 90-73 by the end of the period. "We got stops on the first two possessions (of the third quarter), so we could have cut the lead down to 10," Denver coach Brian Shaw said. "Instead, we dont capitalize on those situations, and they come down and score after that and push it right back up to 18 or 20. It was just one of those kinds of nights." NOTES: Thunder C Kendrick Perkins (left groin strain) and G Thabo Sefolosha (left calf strain) are improving, but still are out. Both have missed about a month. ... Durant has scored 25 or more points in 35 consecutive games, the longest streak since Michael Jordan did it 40 consecutive times during the 1986-87 season. ... Nuggets F Wilson Chandler (left groin strain) and F Jan Vesely (left rib cage contusion) did not play. ... Thunder C Hasheem Thabeet missed the game for personal reasons. ... Oklahoma Citys Adams scored in double figures for just the third time this season. ... Thunder G Mustafa Shakur played for just the third time this season. 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